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New year gifts

Greetings!

Hope you’ve been having a wonderful holiday season and that you’ve had some time off to relax. As the year draws to a close, it’s a nice time to reflect on all that’s happened. It’s also great to start opening up to the possibilities of what you’d like to experience in the upcoming year.

I’ve got a gift for you to help you with that transition. Actually, two gifts! One is a guided tapping audio that is about letting go of the past year and embracing the new one. It’s free for you because, well, I’m so grateful that you are on my list and that you are here reading this!

Here’s the audio! Welcoming the new year
If you would like to see the tapping points, here’s a downloadable PDF.

The other gift is a deep discount during the month of January for an Access Your Inner Wisdom session. This is a 20 minute focused session that does not involve tapping, rather, it is based on dialogue, questions, and mutual intuition. These are only available by phone or Skype.

If you have something that you would like answered, for example, if you’ve been trying to decide on a course of action or how to go about starting or achieving something, and you’ve been feeling unsure which choice to make, this session should help you to find your answer to it. The Access Your Inner Wisdom sessions are also helpful if you’ve been trying to figure something out, like the cause of something or what your role in a situation is all about.

These sessions are normally $40 but for the month of January, I am offering them for $20! Appointments are filling up, so be sure to book yours here.

I wish you a very Happy New Year!

With love,
Stephanie

Here are the links again:
To book your Access Your Inner Wisdom session, click here.
Let go of the old year and bring in the new with this guided tapping visualization

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Pros & cons of EFT tapping scripts

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EFT tapping scripts are a bit of a contentious issue in the tapping world. By scripts I mean written text scripts as well as tap-along videos and audios. Many of these are insightful and eloquently written by experienced practitioners.

I have some thoughts on this that I’d like to share. I would love to hear your thoughts on it and whether or not you use them to complement your tapping practice. Also, if you do like scripts, I’d love to find out what topics you might like addressed in this format.

Please fill out this brief survey to help me find out more!

Cons of using scripted tapping

First of all, the founder of EFT Tapping is against scripts. I understand this because they are almost always too general and they really don’t and can’t address your specific issue. They do not use your personal words. If you only rely on scripts, it is highly unlikely that you will get permanent, long-term results.

Relying on scripted tapping limits your understanding about tapping and can be very disempowering. You end up becoming reliant on the words and guidance of someone else. You never get to learn how to tap on yourself. You may even think that it is enough and that you know how to tap if you have watched enough videos or read enough books.

Another problem with using tapping scripts is that sometimes people get triggered and don’t understand what is happening, and they are not equipped to deal with it alone. Depending on the issue, old emotions can surface or traumatic memories could emerge. If the person does not have a connection to a Tapping Practitioner and/or has not been trained, or if they have a lack of understanding about tapping, it can leave them in an unsafe state.

Tapping scripts do not replace proper training and/or working with a practitioner, but some people do not understand that. Scripts can be quite deceptive that way. Many people believe that is all that tapping is about, and then they feel that it doesn’t work because they have tapped along with some videos and have not gotten the results that they wanted. This is a danger of scripted tapping. In that way, it can and has done a huge disservice to the tapping community.

Pros of using scripted tapping

What I’m about to say here is strictly my opinion. As I mentioned, this is a contentious issue in the tapping community, and many have strong opinions about the dangers of using tapping scripts. I do not disagree with these dangers. That being said, however, I believe that scripted tapping has a place in the tapping world, albeit a limited one.

I think scripts can be a nice accompaniment to learning how to tap on yourself. They are not there to teach you to tap on yourself or to replace learning how to tap on yourself or to working with an experienced practitioner. If you already know how to tap and have been trained, it can be nice to just tap along with a video. It can be relaxing, thought-provoking, and even help you shift perspectives.

Sometimes the script creator/author can bring up something that you weren’t even aware of with respect to an issue. There might be some particular thing connected with that issue that was either hidden from you or that you hadn’t even considered. It might be a different aspect of the issue. It could be a new perspective. I have tapped along with many scripts and have learned a great deal from them.

Another possibility with tapping scripts is that they may demonstrate a different way of approaching or addressing a problem. There is often a lot to learn from tapping along with the words of experienced Tapping Practitioners.

One of these different approaches is the reframe. Reframes are basically when a practitioner moves into more positive wording or different ways of looking at things. For example, what if statements – like what if we look at it this way? Or what if I could be open to the possibility of seeing it some other way? These are more positive ways of looking at things that you may not have been able to access before. Following along with scripts can give you an opportunity to broaden your perspective, which can be a real benefit.

Finally, another positive aspect of using scripts is that you can see how other people create wording. It may give you ideas for how to create, adapt and change some of your own wording in your tapping practice. When you watch all sorts of different practitioners or read what they’ve written, you may be impressed by how they phrase things. You can then use that in your own self-tapping.

I don’t know too many practitioners who haven’t taken on different ways of saying things because of something that they have listened to, seen or read. It might even be when they attended someone else’s training. It gives you the opportunity to be exposed to more.

In summary, there are many pros and cons to using tapping scripts. I feel they can be highly valuable when used appropriately and when seen in their proper place. They may be a great addition to your healing toolbox.

But they are definitely, absolutely, 100% not meant to take the place of learning how to tap properly. They are not meant to be solely relied upon. You really need to learn how to do the work yourself. And you need to individualize it for you, which means you need to learn how to tap properly, not just from a book or by watching YouTube videos!

I would love to hear your thoughts on this!

Again, here is the link to the survey. I thank you in advance!

With love,
Stephanie

Remember that you are loved

 

you are loved

I made this so anyone coming by my office will remember it.

New Year’s resolutions tanked? Try something different

new habits

Just like the leaves changing colours in the fall and cherry blossoms blooming in the spring, the annual cycle at my gym is unfolding before me. It’s finally getting back to its normal pace and I can get on the machines or find a bench to work on when I want to! The well-intentioned New Year’s resolutioning hordes have done their thing – dutifully starting up in January and then letting it all go by about this time of year.

While I have never been a fan of making these resolutions, I am, however, a huge advocate of building new habits and making incremental changes in order to effect permanent and sustainable positive changes.

I came across an interesting article by Leo Babauta on something called the Habit Sprint and thought I’d share it with you along with some additional recommendations.

The basic idea is to focus on one habit at a time, pay attention to it, and adjust it in short stints. The method consists of these simple steps (detailed instructions are in the article):

1. Plan – this is about getting very clear as to the habit, the time and how you will fit it into your schedule
2. Execute – do it (or don’t do it if it’s something you are avoiding), paying attention to how it’s going and what may or may not be working for you
3. Review – at the end of the week, ask yourself some questions about what happened and how to improve it
4. Improve – based on what you found out in your review, create your new plan for the next week

I love the logic of this and have been playing around with it with positive results. What makes this so different from other habit-setting methods is that it is based on a constant feedback loop which helps you to understand why you may be having difficulties with the new habit.

I would also add in another step in order to address any emotional blockages, resistance or self-sabotage that may emerge as a result of trying to do this new habit. After the review in step 3, try tapping on anything that has come up. Here’s an example (if you don’t know that tapping points, check out this video):

Tapping on the side of the hand:

“Even though I didn’t feel like doing [name the habit] and so I didn’t do it every day like I planned, I accept myself as best I can”

“Even though I can’t seem to get myself to do [the habit] as much as I’d planned, I love and accept myself anyway”

“Even though a part of me really wants to do this [new habit] and there’s some other part of me that is totally resistant, I accept and acknowledge all the parts of me”

Top of head: I don’t feel like doing it!
Inside eyebrow: I didn’t do it like I planned
Side of eye: I feel like a failure
Under eye: I feel so resistant
Under nose: All this resistance
Chin: Part of me doesn’t want to do this
Collarbone: All this blockage
Under arm: Everything this is to me
Wrist: All the reasons I can’t get myself to do this

Top of head: I don’t want to do it
Inside eyebrow: I’m not doing it!
Side of eye: You can’t make me!
Under eye: All this resistance
Under nose: Everything that’s blocking me
Chin: From taking care of myself in new ways
Collarbone: I acknowledge all of it
Under arm: Some part of me doesn’t want to do this
Wrist: And some part of me does

Take a breath and check in. If you still have lots of resistance, keep tapping until the intensity comes down. Be sure to use your own language that addresses your specific feelings. When you feel calmer about it, you can try some positive language.

Top of head: I wonder what it would take
Inside eyebrow: For me to embrace this new habit
Side of eye: Maybe I need to change how much or when I do it
Under eye: And maybe that’s okay
Under nose: What if I could embrace this new way of being?
Chin: Who would I be if I kept up with this [new habit]?
Collarbone: I wonder if I’d feel healthier?
Under arm: I wonder if I’d feel happier?
Wrist: What would it take for me to embrace this completely?

Take another breath and release it all.

I believe that this approach provides a great way to try on some new habits and specifically notice what keeps you from adopting them. Adding the tapping will help you to break through the blockages that might otherwise sabotage your best efforts. It may be that you decide that the new habit isn’t for you after all – that’s great information too! Or you may just find the perfect way to fit it into your life on a permanent basis.

With love,
Stephanie

New beginnings

Happy New Years

I don’t know about you, but I’m a sucker for new beginnings and fresh starts. I don’t think I’m alone. Some people relish checking things off their to-do lists or finishing a plan or achieving a goal – don’t get me wrong, I love that too – but there’s something about the seduction of the beginning, the conception of a new plan that really gets fires me up. I’m that girl and I can admit it.

Once I’ve got that thing going, whether it’s a new plan, project or goal, the excitement rises. I love diving in with that sense of “wow, I’m doing it! Can’t wait to see it unfold, hopefully the way I’ve imagined it!”

A funny thing starts to happen along the way. Life seems to creep in with its inevitable pauses, sidetracking or more mundane aspects of the thing that needs to be done. Sometimes further along into it, I get the feeling that I’ve lost the plot or have somehow veered too far from the original course. At these times, I’ve noticed that I can perceive this as a muddying of the original vision.

As I lose steam, depending on the thing, I may still continue on along the original course and follow it to completion. Other times I let it go completely. More often I will go back and kind of attempt a new beginning, trying to get my excitement flowing again, reimagining it and making whatever adjustments are needed to suit my present needs.

In the past, at those times when I had decided not to finish something or had made significant changes to the original plan, I had internally berated myself for not having the wherewithal to fulfill the original vision I’d had. I have come to see things a bit differently, that perhaps there’s nothing inherently wrong with those actions.

Life is dynamic. It’s a balance of stillness and movement, change and stability. If the original ideal vision didn’t continue to shine clearly enough through the carrying-out and making-it-so part of the action plan, well, maybe that vision actually needed to adjust and grow in the ever-changing present moment.

This is relatively new way of looking at things for me. I’m not talking about abandoning plans or goals due to self-sabotage, procrastination or laziness – that’s a whole other issue. I’m looking more at the fire that keeps something burning and alive. Everyone is different – for me, I really need that spark to stay motivated. Something about that spark and the feeling of newness are intricately linked for me.

So I have decided to take a new approach. I’m going to really embrace the thought and awareness that EVERY MOMENT IS A CHANCE FOR A NEW START. No matter what I’ve planned or imagined. The reality is that all we ever have is the present moment. When we are holding on to the past or living in the future, we’re torn out of the present moment. That doesn’t mean we can’t have plans or dreams or goals and carry them out, rather, it just means that in any given moment, it really all is new and fresh and we can choose to do and be our best in that moment.

It’s like every single moment is a fresh slate full of possibility. Just that thought gets me going and motivated. Every moment we have an opportunity to press the ‘refresh’ button in our lives.

Now THAT might keep me going through anything. How about you? What would it take to bring the feeling of newness and fresh starts to every day, and to every moment?

I wish you all boundless joy, love, prosperity, health and fun in 2015!

With love,
Stephanie

The downtime challenge, part 2

For more details, ideas, worksheet and inspiration about this challenge, check this out! The downtime 30-day challenge

downtime challenge

The downtime challenge

50 ways to take a break

OK, tell the truth – how much time do you kill every day trolling about online, checking out social media, browsing magazines, watching TV or being distracted by shiny objects? Let’s face it – everyone needs some stress relief and downtime to unwind.  We want to take care of ourselves and our needs by seeking out those things that make us feel good.
The problem comes when those actions are only a short-term fix. They can become addictive and get us sidetracked from our long-term goals and overall wellness.

Recently, one of my awesome clients was looking at how to strike a work-life balance. His taxing and time-consuming job had been getting the best of him and causing a lot of built up stress. He was finding it tough to figure out how to recover from that stress and feel rested and rejuvenated. There just didn’t seem to be enough time in the day.

We took a look at the downtime he’d been taking throughout his entire day and what he was doing during those times.  He knew he was taking breaks in some form – in his case, spending time on social media, perusing the internet and then sometimes feeling kind of paralyzed and exhausted after work.

He felt kind of guilty about doing some of those things, especially the social media stuff, and he believed he was spending too much time there and that it was really unproductive. I reminded him that this may just be the way that he needed to take breaks. The downtime was necessary, and this just happened to be the way he was creating it.

He then had a great realization that what he was doing with respect to his downtime was kind of like always reaching for junk/fast food when he was truly hungry.  It was a great quick fix, but it wasn’t actually nourishing and if kept up long term, would be quite depleting.  It was a great aha! moment!

He realized that he was spending almost two hours a day in these downtime activities. This was great news because it meant he now had two hours that he could transform! We went through his daily schedule and he worked out a new plan that built in time for intentional breaks that would support rather than drain him.  It still included time for reading articles and browsing social media, but those activities would be limited by using tools as simple as setting a timer.

So now I’m going to put this challenge out to all of you. I’m also going to do it, since I think my downtime is a little too junk-food filled! The point of this challenge is to create new strategies to keep you more balanced throughout the day so that you’re never so starved (by stress) that you need to reach for the junk food activities to soothe you.

Here’s the 30 day challenge!

1. For a day or two, notice how you spend your downtime. Take some notes. See how much time you actually spend doing junk-food type things and how you feel afterwards – do you feel relaxed and replenished or drained and anxious?  This is completely subjective; an activity you may find necessary or nourishing to you may be someone else’s junk food.

2. Make a new plan for yourself. Be realistic. This isn’t about setting yourself up for failure or self-recrimination if you don’t follow it! Try some small changes over the next 30 days, and be sure to schedule in SOME time for those activities that give you pleasure even if they are a little bit of junk food. This is about creating balance.

3. Post your proposed changes up on my Facebook page if you’re up for sharing.

4. After 30 days of trying the new routine, post again about your results. Do you feel any different? Was the challenge easy or tough?

I’m looking forward to hearing from you!

With love,
Stephanie